10 Months Today

I realized last night that it has been 10 months today since Mom died. It is so hard to believe that it has been that long. That I have survived a the summer, Ellie's birthday, my anniversary, my birthday, Christmas, New Years, Miles birthday, and so much more without her. She always tried to make those times special. I didn't believe it was possible for me to survive 10 months ago.

Then I think that just a year ago, I was able to talk to her on the phone whenever I felt like it. I could share my joy and my hurts with her, and would always recieve sound Biblical advice from her. I really miss that. That just a year ago, we were planning Easter at her house, I was looking forward to spending the holiday with them and watching her enjoy her grandchildren. Little did I know it would be the last time I would see her alive. We would discuss her plans for the CEF booth at the fair, and bounce ideas around.

Today I was looking through a Current catalog and noticed the Mother's Day cards. They were being sold in sets of two and I broke down in tears thinking I only needed to buy one this year. I can't tell her how much I appreciated her and how much she meant to me.

Ok. Now I am going to end this pity party and go get on with my real life and take care of my kids and my family like I know she would want me to. I can hear her now telling me to stop feeling sorry for my self and get up and do something!